Here is a new article I wrote over at the Home Maker's Corner. It deals with an article by a woman who does not agree with the personal rule some married Christian men have not to eat alone or be alone with any woman other than their own wives.
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Romans 12:17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.
Last year, I ran across this post on another blog that got me to thinking: "Billy Graham’s Rule – Misusing it to Hold Back Women and Men of God." The guest writer (Kelly Ladd Bishop) who wrote this item was talking about the standard Mike Pence has to not eat alone with any woman other than his wife and to only enter certain situations if she is with him. This has been called "The Billy Graham Rule" because Mr. Graham had a similar standard for himself during his ministry.
Kelly Bishop is mostly addressing a "tweet" by a certain man which she took exception to, but in the course of her writing about it she made some points that I wanted to address.
Ms. Bishop writes:
"While there are times when it is appropriate for a person to set up boundaries that protect his or her marriage, it is not appropriate to make blanket statements or rules regarding the opposite sex – especially when it puts one sex at a real disadvantage in business, ministry, or life in general. It also doesn’t respect either men or women. It assumes that men can’t control themselves in the presence of a women who is not their wife, and that women are temptations that must be avoided. As brothers and sisters in Christ, we can do better."
"...A straw man argument is an argument that sounds like it is refuting an opposing view, but is actually refuting an argument that was never made..."
Having rules of conduct is appropriate in certain situations. This is why we are given many of them in scripture, even in the New Testament teachings to the church. Personal standards, however, should be viewed as non-absolute. We may make a rule or boundary for ourselves, but we need to realize that there may arise some situations that will make it necessary to break it in order to obey the commands of scripture.
Examples:
When we were all still at home my mom had a personal standard that she never washed laundry on Sundays. She worked hard to make sure it was done during the rest of the week so that she (and we) could have a rest from that. But, when we had friends staying with us who had some special need to do laundry at our house on Sunday, she didn't balk at that.
I didn't know this was called the "Billy Graham" rule. I like it. I think there are many benefits to the opposite genders not being alone with one another, married and unmarried. One of the top benefits is that it protects women! As you mentioned, emotional bonds form between people when they pour their hearts out, sharing their fears, struggles, and joys, as would happen in a marriage counseling situation. Anyone who would deny that needs a reality check!
ReplyDeleteI didn't know it was called that either until the whole thing surround Mike Pence got attention last year. I may have learned it from that particular article, I don't remember now.
DeleteConsidering all the terrible things that have happened to women when they spent time alone with pastors, bosses, etc. I find it quite odd that some women get so mad about this position. It is an area where we all should be wanting to practice caution, especially in the body of Christ.