[Photo of my mom and a friend having a good laugh circa 1950.]
I don’t know who the author is of these clever words, but they tickled me. :-)
1. AQUADEXTROUS (ak wa deks' trus) adj.
Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toe.
2. CARPERPETUATION (kar' pur pet u a shun) n.
The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.
3. DISCONFECT (dis kon fekt') v.
To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow remove all the germs.
4. ELBONICS (el bon' iks) n.
The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a stadium.
5. FRUST (frust) n.
The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
6. LACTOMANGULATION (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n.
Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the "illegal" side.
7. PEDIGEOTITE (ped' i' geo' tite') n.
The small rocks that you get in your shoe when there's no place to sit down and remove it.
8. PHONESIA (fo nee' zhuh) n.
The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
9. PUPGUNK (pup' gunk) n.
The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.
10. TELECRASTINATION (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n.
The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.